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Ye Olde Guide for the SEC Sending Investing Into the Past

Secure Retirement
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Ye Olde Guide for the SEC Sending Investing Into the Past 

“Hear ye, hear ye: We doth proclaim new rules forbidding technologies that our kingdom, the Securities and Exchange Commission, deemeth to be unworthy of investors.” 

While this is not a direct quote, this is how we imagine SEC Chair Gary Gensler proposing the agency’s new anti-tech rules, which will send investing into the past and eliminate access to affordable investment advice and financial products. 

Do we want to go back in time so that only wealthy investors have access to advice and financial products while everyday Americans are left to fend for themselves? Of course not! But since the SEC is sending investing back to the past, it may be time to brush up on ye olde English to prepare…just in case. 

Check out these old-fashioned English definitions below to prepare yourself for the SEC’s new proposal: 

Physick (n.): Medicine, healing, or treatment 

  • Used in a sentence: By giving investors a voice, Secure Financial Future was an effective physick against the SEC's harmful, anti-tech proposal. 

Fopdoodle (n.): A foolish person 

  • Used in a sentence: The SEC thinks everyday investors are fopdoodles, believing that they can’t make decisions for themselves based on disclosures and other reliable forms of transparency. 
Fopdoodle definition

 

Travail (v.): Engage in painful or laborious effort 

  • Used in a sentence: Investors may travail when trying to save for their financial futures, since the SEC’s proposed rules could restrict everything from calculators to spreadsheets, forcing fax machines and letters back into our lives. 

Jargogle (v.): Confuse 

  • Used in a sentence: The SEC’s proposed rules dictate how companies communicate with investors to support their investment strategies. This could jargogle investors, harm their investment progress, and even violate the First Amendment. 

Wamblecropt (adj.): Feeling indigestion, sickly 

  • Used in a sentence: The thought of preventing future innovation that helps investors like that leaves us wamblecropt. 

Choleric (adj.): Angry, irate 

  • Used in a sentence: The SEC’s proposal has left investors feeling choleric because the agency has shown no evidence of a problem with technology, instead basing its breathtakingly broad rules on unproven, speculative theories. 
Definition of Choleric

 

Clamor (n.): Uproar 

  • Used in a sentence: When the SEC proposed its anti-tech rules, Secure Financial Future advocates raised quite a clamor to demand the rules be left in the dustbin of history.  

Besmirch (v.): To cause harm or damage to the purity, luster, or beauty of (something) 

  • Used in a sentence: Technology has allowed everyone to become an investor, but the SEC’s new proposed rules will besmirch the current system by restricting the very technologies that help Americans secure their financial futures. 

O'er-rauhot (v.): Overcome 

  • Used in a sentence: Seeing yet another big government mandate that will crush investors’ wallets, investors were almost o'er-rauhot, but rallied to push back against this ridiculous proposal! 

We’re not in Medieval times anymore. As American investors, it’s time to corrade ([v.] to scrape together) our feedback to this harmful policy and let the SEC know we won’t stand for it! 

Fill out our form to encourage Congress to send a letter to SEC Chair Gary Gensler or demand answers as to why he is hurting investors at an upcoming Congressional hearing.